Confessions

Sometimes I wonder how I haven't run out of things to "look up" online.

I miss being a kid. No bills, no jobs, no worries!

I have tons of irrational fears/thoughts. These are both random (like when Kevin leaves for work with L and I have a quick thought of "what if something happens to them on the way to my moms?") I hate that my mind even flashes those thoughts.
Then there is the "Is L developing correctly?" "What will she turn out to be like?" I watched too much Dateline, 2020, and Intervention. GAH!

I HATE and LOVE how L loves my mother to pieces. She pitches fits when we leave their house. She cries when my mom walks out of the room. She lights up when my mom walks back into the room. I wouldn't want her to do that with anyone but my mom, well unless it was with ME!
I yell at her telling her I delivered her and she better love me! lol

I don't go a day with out thinking about my weight, what I've eaten or if I've exercised enough.

I'm getting to know my MIL more by hanging out with her this summer. We went to breakfast this morning. She really is a cool person!

I can't stand people on facebook who put the same shit as their status every single day. Everyone knows your on vaca, your loving life, your family is the best, you're very grateful for everything. Guess what... NO ONE GIVES A SHIT after the 50th time!

There are a group of coworkers I can't stand at all. They are so fake. They don't hesitate to talk shit about anyone behind their back. They do all they can to brown nose the right people. I'm the do your job and go home kinda person.

I wish I could have a baby for my sister... not sure I could handle that whole process.

I could sleep in till 11 everyday if it wasn't for L waking up! ::yawn::

I'm such a d o r k!

I'm moving my classroom tomorrow to the kindergarten hall and I am totally excited!

I think having new scenery is going to be great.

I've been in the same hallway/room for 4 years. I was always one of those kids that moved my bedroom furniture around 3 times a year. Mom would come home to crap every where. And I'd have my butt behind my dresser pushing it around the room!

The classroom I am moving to is bigger and much more open. The last 4 years I've been in a concreatable (a room they added on later as the school grew, no windows but 1). My new room has windows all across the front and lets in more natural light.

I am trying to picture in my head where I am going to put everything. I love the beginning of the year because it's a fresh start. :)

-1.8 Not to shabby

I've been trying really hard to watch what goes in my mouth. Not to say I don't give in here and there. Looks like its paying off. Total weight loss right now 6.2lbs. I'll take it! :)

Pretty Amazed

This was my pumpkin 10 months ago.... and the picture below is her today! Wow, it amazes me how fast babies grow the first year. Before having L I didn't realize how short of a time period a year was. I use to think, Uh a YEAR... that's forever from now! Oh how I was wrong! Her first year of life is almost over. ::tear::

On another note, I am giving myself credit today for things I don't normally do.

-I went walking 2 times this week! Yay! That's more then I've done in a l o n g time.

-I am a great mom! We've been having so much fun this summer. I love, love, love watching her play on her own. Sitting there talking to her toys, looking at her books in depth and seeing her tiny gears in her head turning. She is my little sponge! Which reminds me we need to seriously get our mouths in shape. No more cuss words. My mouth is horrible sometimes. Especially when someone doesn't know how to drive in front of me!

-I ate pretty well this week. Don't think I lost any but we will find out tomorrow morning. Eeekk!

And another note! I feel like everyone (online buds) are TTC baby #2. I am kinda jealous. I am totally wishy washy when it comes to baby #2. Well just to put it out there, we won't be TTC again any time soon. We aren't saving $$ right now so until that happens we don't feel comfortable bringing another life into the world. I would LOVE to be pregnant again. But then I want to know L's little personality before having to focus on another lil' one. And I am *trying* to get back in shape so being pregnant would blow that out of the water. Have I said all this before?! Feeling like I've already posted this rant! lol

Ahh guess time will tell! :)

To those who comment in Chinese letters

I don't know what you are writing so please do not take it as me being rude when I do not respond and or delete you comments. That's all! Thanks! :)

We need to hit the LOTTO!

So tired of having to worry about $$.

I know this is probably never going to end. Unless we hit the lotto!
We have two goals at this point for saving $.

We want another child in the near future. We're not TTC right now by any means for more then one reason.
a) I want to enjoy L more and get to know her little personality. I want to be able to focus on her for another year at least.
b) We need more $$ to afford to have another baby
and
c) I am working really hard (kinda hard) on getting my body into shape

And we also want to buy a house in the next 3 maybe 4 years. We currently live in a town house which isn't tiny. I want a backyard and a real drive way... random huh?!
I am tired of this parking lot and lugging all this shit in daily! And when it rains it sucks even more. I want a kitchen with more room. And a pool would be nice too!!

Okay I drifted off into lala land there for a moment.

We're not broke at all. We just have a # that we like to stay above in our account. We already do the Florida prepaid college fund for L so that's getting done. Which in return will save us $ later on. We're not living paycheck to paycheck. We just aren't saving like we'd like to.

We decided that we need to not do all the things we wanted to this summer.
No Dave Matthews tickets :(
No going to Orlando to visit our friends.
No buying all the fun stuff for my classroom I was looking at (this I'm ok with)
No going all out on L's first birthday

I think I'm saddest about the Dave Matthews concert. It's been like a tradition for us.

I guess what it all comes down to is... I am thankful for so many other things that $ isn't really that important. I know for a fact their are families out there that are way worse off then us right now!

Just hoping things all work out in the long run!

First weigh in today in a month

And I was shocked.

I didn't gain at all. In fact I was down 0.2 so now I am at an exact 165lbs! Whoo hoo!

I don't think the tiny old lady weighing me in realized it had been a month since the last time I was there. She praised me for not gaining and sent me off. I was thrilled. I'll take it at this point.

So today the hubs and I went to the grocery store. I sware the two of us have the BIGGEST junk tooth there is. We both love the same horrible foods. Although he'll eat anything you put in front of him be it junk or healthy food.

As for my little lady who I've neglected to write about in the last few weeks... she is wonderful. I just love her to pieces.

I am in love with the way she burrows her tiny head into my chest when I go in and pick her up from her naps or first thing in the morning.

Right now I am almost positive she is getting both top teeth at the same time. Her gums are super white and she has an excessive amount of drool.

I'm not gonna lie. I am pretty much OVER the whole "dada" bit. I tell her 10 times a day she needs to move onto another consonant... "mmm" might be a start! But I doubt it's going to happen anytime soon.

She is eating like a champ. I have yet to put something in her mouth she doesn't like (not sure if that's a good or bad thing) She hoovers around me while I am eating. She won't let me get away without giving her a taste.

She's taken a few spills since pulling up onto things. It kills me but I know it's just the start!

I'm having a great time being a "pretend" SAHM! That's what I call it since its only a few months. I do think it would be tough to do it full time. I'd want to go out and do all kinds of things that cost $$ that we don't have right now. Inside things like this place called A Latte fun. Its a kids gym with an adult coffee shop inside too. Its fun and has air conditioning which is a MUST in hot a** south florida right now. It's like $8-10 per kid to get in. I think L is free since she is so small still.

We will be doing lots of play dates in the coming weeks. This week we're going to visit our friend Melissa who has a 4 week old and a 4 year old. Would it be rude to bring L with me?? I know kids are carriers but she has a live in carrier... thoughts?

Then we have a old high school friend who has 2 year old twin girls. We might meet up with them.

Gotta keep busy!!