Starting a new blog...

I want a new blog. No real reason.

So if you'd like to follow it please send me a message letting me know who you are and you're email address! :)

Learned a lot about myself recently

1. I am more of a paranoid mom then I thought I'd be.

L's been sick and I am freaking out she is going to get dehydrated. Pedi said to stop giving her formula so the diarrhea stops (which it has) so I've been pushing pedialyte that she isn't a fan of. I felt like I was hit by a bus by 5pm yesterday simply from worrying all.freakin.day!

2. I totally have an emotional eating issue.

With her being sick I've been stressed. I turn to junk food for comfort... I've never really realized this before!! It's really that I noticed it cause now I am making a conscious effort to distance myself from it all. Considering I lost ZERO pounds last week motivates me even more.

3. I get irritable very fast over nothing.

This I've kind have seen before but totally saw it the last few days. It started with not losing any weight last week, then talking to DH about $$, and having L get sick to finish it off. I went to bed early last night before punching something!! I didn't fall asleep till about 11 :::yawns:::

4. I'm not sure I could be a SAHM.

LOVE, love, love staying home with her. But I've realized I have to have some adult interaction during the week.

That's it! I must go do something productive before nap time ends!

:)

Lost 1 lb this week. Not horrible but no spectacular either! BUT I am almost to my 5% lost. Total lost so far is 7.2.

So I am determined to walk 4 times this week in this nasty heat. I want to get back into the 150's. I went through some clothes in the closet and was VERY surprised I fit into a few capris and pants. Before I use to stuff my fat arse in them and looked like I was spilling out of them! Gross.

It amazes me how just a few pounds make such a difference. :)

On another note Lillian is getting 2 more teeth. :(

It's so sad having her wake up in the middle of the night moaning and groaning cause they are bothering her. We've been using the hylands tablets which have helped.

She said "dog" this morning. Clear and perfectly. Before it was just "dah".

I think going back to work is going to be tougher then it was when she was 8 weeks old. :/

I am not looking forward to it at all.

I love getting her out of her crib in the morning and from naps. She sometimes pretends to be sleeping still. She'll throw herself down and lay flat out with out moving... it cracks me up!

We start swim lessons tomorrow. Kinda nervous. Not sure what we'll be doing. I am terrified of dunking her head under the water. She isn't a fan of getting water poured over her head in the bath. Hoping she learns something from it. It's only 2 weeks long. We can't afford the other swim programs. SIL is paying $55 a week for 3, 15 minutes sessions. We paid $45 for 8, 30 minute sessions. Anything she gets is better then nothing!

My classroom is coming along. I bought stuff to make curtains to cover some cabinets. I've never really sewn anything so this is going to be an experience. My mom has a machine she's never even used so we busted it out and will be using it. She knows how to sew but we're still figuring out this machine itself! Hopefully they turn out decent!

I have a major head start over everyone at school. All my boxes are unpacked, furniture moved in and set up. That feels great to know. There are tons of people moving rooms this year so come Aug it'll be interesting! Everyone wanted a grade change.

Gotta go get ready for church :)

Confessions

Sometimes I wonder how I haven't run out of things to "look up" online.

I miss being a kid. No bills, no jobs, no worries!

I have tons of irrational fears/thoughts. These are both random (like when Kevin leaves for work with L and I have a quick thought of "what if something happens to them on the way to my moms?") I hate that my mind even flashes those thoughts.
Then there is the "Is L developing correctly?" "What will she turn out to be like?" I watched too much Dateline, 2020, and Intervention. GAH!

I HATE and LOVE how L loves my mother to pieces. She pitches fits when we leave their house. She cries when my mom walks out of the room. She lights up when my mom walks back into the room. I wouldn't want her to do that with anyone but my mom, well unless it was with ME!
I yell at her telling her I delivered her and she better love me! lol

I don't go a day with out thinking about my weight, what I've eaten or if I've exercised enough.

I'm getting to know my MIL more by hanging out with her this summer. We went to breakfast this morning. She really is a cool person!

I can't stand people on facebook who put the same shit as their status every single day. Everyone knows your on vaca, your loving life, your family is the best, you're very grateful for everything. Guess what... NO ONE GIVES A SHIT after the 50th time!

There are a group of coworkers I can't stand at all. They are so fake. They don't hesitate to talk shit about anyone behind their back. They do all they can to brown nose the right people. I'm the do your job and go home kinda person.

I wish I could have a baby for my sister... not sure I could handle that whole process.

I could sleep in till 11 everyday if it wasn't for L waking up! ::yawn::

I'm such a d o r k!

I'm moving my classroom tomorrow to the kindergarten hall and I am totally excited!

I think having new scenery is going to be great.

I've been in the same hallway/room for 4 years. I was always one of those kids that moved my bedroom furniture around 3 times a year. Mom would come home to crap every where. And I'd have my butt behind my dresser pushing it around the room!

The classroom I am moving to is bigger and much more open. The last 4 years I've been in a concreatable (a room they added on later as the school grew, no windows but 1). My new room has windows all across the front and lets in more natural light.

I am trying to picture in my head where I am going to put everything. I love the beginning of the year because it's a fresh start. :)

-1.8 Not to shabby

I've been trying really hard to watch what goes in my mouth. Not to say I don't give in here and there. Looks like its paying off. Total weight loss right now 6.2lbs. I'll take it! :)

Pretty Amazed

This was my pumpkin 10 months ago.... and the picture below is her today! Wow, it amazes me how fast babies grow the first year. Before having L I didn't realize how short of a time period a year was. I use to think, Uh a YEAR... that's forever from now! Oh how I was wrong! Her first year of life is almost over. ::tear::

On another note, I am giving myself credit today for things I don't normally do.

-I went walking 2 times this week! Yay! That's more then I've done in a l o n g time.

-I am a great mom! We've been having so much fun this summer. I love, love, love watching her play on her own. Sitting there talking to her toys, looking at her books in depth and seeing her tiny gears in her head turning. She is my little sponge! Which reminds me we need to seriously get our mouths in shape. No more cuss words. My mouth is horrible sometimes. Especially when someone doesn't know how to drive in front of me!

-I ate pretty well this week. Don't think I lost any but we will find out tomorrow morning. Eeekk!

And another note! I feel like everyone (online buds) are TTC baby #2. I am kinda jealous. I am totally wishy washy when it comes to baby #2. Well just to put it out there, we won't be TTC again any time soon. We aren't saving $$ right now so until that happens we don't feel comfortable bringing another life into the world. I would LOVE to be pregnant again. But then I want to know L's little personality before having to focus on another lil' one. And I am *trying* to get back in shape so being pregnant would blow that out of the water. Have I said all this before?! Feeling like I've already posted this rant! lol

Ahh guess time will tell! :)