I want to be a SAHM!

So today being MLK day I had off... we had such a good time today. First we met a friend at the mall for lunch. We did a little window shopping too (can't afford one store in that mall) and browsed the racks of $200 dresses. I was in need of a dress for an up coming wedding. Then we met my friends mom at Kirkland where we tried not to knock anything over!
After that we ventured over to TJ Maxx which dear lord you woulda thought they were giving stuff away. So freaking busy. It was like an obstacle course getting through those aisles.
We hit up Publix and to get some stuff for the dinner I am going to wing cooking tonight. My MIL makes the best stuffed shrimp and so I am going to try it. Although I couldn't get through to her because when she watches Alexa she turns the phone off while baby naps. Seriously, shove the effing thing under a pillow! Annoying.
So now I sit here trying to get her to take a nap... she is fussing in her crib. She hasn't napped at all this afternoon so she is due.
I would love.love.love to be able to stay home with her. I know its never going to be an option but I am sooo lucky to know I at least have summers off and breaks here and there. Couldn't imagine working straight through the year like most do. Knowing I'll have that time soon makes me happy! :)

Prayers needed...

My best friend's SIL (got all that) had her little baby at 25 weeks on Thursday. He was 1lb 9oz. At this point they say he is stable. He had 2 blood transfusions and is hanging in there. Such a little trooper already. They are lucky enough to have a Ronald McDonald house to stay in. When she went into labor they transported her 2 hours away from home to a hospital with a special NICU in it. She only has on what she wore to the doctor that day.
Baby's name is Christopher. Thanks so much!

WHY did I just eat that?

Seriously, chex mix. I didn't need you. This whole weight loss thing isn't going so well. I have no hand to mouth control at all. I was talking to my lovely friend E last night and told her something I've NEVER told anyone so far.
I miss being pregnant.
When I was pregnant I didn't have to worry about my fat ass.

I need to get my mind in gear. This isn't working what I got going on! :/

Burnt out teacher here!

I love my job I really, really do! But I am having a hard time since being out at the beginning of the year. They seriously look at me like my heads cut off when I call them out for talking during writing.
We went over this 20 million times. When the music is on you are silent. Silent means no talking. Lets practice it now.... good. Do just that during writing. Should you be playing with your plastic wrapper from snack during writing? No, Mrs.A. Well what should you be doing? Writing. Ok what are you going to do to fix it? Write.
NOT EVEN 2 MINUTES LATER HE IS PLAYING AGAIN! Seriously. And I technically should be "conferencing" with others at this time!
My head is still attached to my shoulders. STOP looking at me like that when I again call you out for NOT WRITING. Pick a small moment, you're NOT done. WHen you're done you've only just begun....
ADD to your pictures
ADD to your words
ADD, ADD, ADD. Or start a new piece. And if I hear you went to the pool one more time I might just cut off my own head.
Reading... who teaches reading in 1st grade. GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Teaching reading to 16 different kids on 10 different levels. Who has a dull butter knife???
I'm sorry Mrs.Smith. Your son does nothing in class. He doesn't look at the pictures while reading. He does not chunk the word and see if he knows AT least part of the word. He doesn't ask himself 1) does that word make sense 2) does that word sound right 3) does that word look right. Nope he keeps on keepin on reading that book all effed up!
"The cat ran no them c-c-c /c- ow-sh." So yes, yes he might stay back in 1st grade again if he doesn't get his shit together and stop playing and start reading during independent reading time. So NOT sorry! I don't care if you are embarrassed your son doesn't TRY!
V.E.N.T over! 5:30 am will be here soon and I'll have to do this shit called 1st grade all over again. Ahhh the feelings of working in title one! LOVE it!

4 Months... WOW!

I can't believe my baby is 4 months old already. I never thought that it would be so hard on me to see her get bigger. But I'm a big ole' mush pot over it. Just moving her out of her 3 months clothes is killing me! I was squeezing her chubby little butt in them till this week! :(
Lillian has changed so much. Rolling all over the place. I put her in her swing and literally turned my back to pick something off the floor and swoop there she went...facing backwards in the swing and flopping around like a fish.

DROOL! We have lots of it. Not sure if she is teething or what. She has her hands in her mouth a ton and her cheeks get bright red sometimes. I've felt around in there and don't feel anything. She is still NOT sttn. GAH! She is a total tease. One night this week she didn't get up at all. Then the next night she was up fussing 7-8 times. Usually we put the paci in her mouth and that satisfies her.

Its been SO crazy cold down here. 30's in FL huh? But yes it has been. Usually it'll get cold and then warm up during the day. It's stayed in the 50's a few days this week for the high. So we've had to bundle her up to go to grandma's in the morning.

I've had a few meltdowns recently. I've realized that being a mom (even though my DH is so very helpful) is no joke freaking hard. Hard as in I can't fit in everything. I am sick with myself personally. F.A.T- I went up 15 lbs after having Lillian. I lost the weight so quickly and should have paid more attention to KEEPing it off. But I didn't so now I am up 10lbs from what I was before getting PG. How does that happen? Uh, maybe from getting home late and not exercising. Maybe from eating like crap the last 3 months. Yes, that will do it.

Then I have work. Wow work sucks when you can't leave it at work. I have so much stuff I could/should be doing but I can't. And I refuse to do it when I could be spending time with Lillian. So I have reverted back to the old way of doing lesson plans. Handwriting them in. Administration isn't a big fan of people doing it that way but it isn't in our contract that they have to be typed out. Its just easier for me to be able to jot it down here and there. Rather then sitting behind a computer for hours.

Then there is the house... its dirty. And to be honest its the least of my worries!! Sooner or later I'll get it ALL together!!